


When I’m With You

by fallenkings



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Teen Angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-22
Updated: 2016-10-10
Packaged: 2018-07-26 00:15:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7552678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallenkings/pseuds/fallenkings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jean is a lovestruck teen missing his boyfriend and everyone feels for him because Armin is another country away and Jean is dysfunctional without him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is mostly a fic containing short, drabble-like chapters that I would update sporadically whenever I need a break.

Class was in session Monday morning. It was chemistry with Professor Hange, a class that Jean used to loath but learned to love because it was the only period he shared with Armin, his boyfriend since freshman year, who also happened to be his lab partner for the class. 

Jean loved it because he could hold Armin’s hand under the table and whisper sweet nothings in his ear. He could sneak kisses in between taking notes and carrying out experiments until Armin chided him with a flushed face to pay attention and Jean would do the exact opposite.

But now he hated chemistry with every fiber in his body because he couldn’t understand a single thing the teacher was preaching about, the stool was uncomfortable and the vacant spot beside him was a glaring reminder that Armin wasn’t here.

Jean found himself staring at Armin’s place, desperately wishing he was here instead of being all the way in Vancouver. 142.6 miles away. That’s a two hour and thirty-three minute drive from Seattle, and he hadn’t even counted the hour and a half it took to make it past the border.

Jean wanted to hop in his car and drive over there right this second but what if Armin was busy and he ended up getting in his way?

Armin wasn’t there for vacation. He was on a full scholarship in Sina. He wouldn’t have time for Jean to pop-up unannounced.

The longer he stared at Armin’s vacant seat, the more he missed him. His throat felt dry when he swallowed. Jean tore his gaze away from Armin’s chair, blinking rapidly because his eyes were stinging and the back of his throat felt like it was burning.

Why was it suddenly so hard to breathe?

“Jean?” Sasha whispered from the next table, looking at him with an empathetic gaze that made his clenched fists tighten even more over the desk.

He felt eyes on him, searing into his flesh, and when he looked up, the majority of his classmates were looking at him with similar looks of sympathy. Jean gritted his teeth and glared out the window, ignoring their gazes and Sasha’s comforting hand on his arm. 

She gave it a light squeeze to let him know that he wasn’t alone but somehow it sure felt like he was.

  



	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't exactly have a plan for this drabble sized fic. I just write whatever I can pull out of my hat at the moment so the timelines may be all over the place and doesn't really seem like they connect at all.

As he drove down the highway, futher away from Seattle and closer to Vancouver, Jean couldn’t help but feel dread sink in his stomach and suddenly it was hard to swallow. He didn’t have to look over to know that Armin was feeling the exact same way, maybe he was faring even worse because the blond was being unusually silent.

Three suitcases full of Armin’s clothes sat in the trunk of his second-hand Honda Civic which Jean tried very hard to not think about. The backseat of the car was filled with sealed boxes of Armin’s books and other precious possessions, meticulously taped and labeled on the sides with Sharpie.

Armin was only going to be away for four years, give or take, but it felt like he was leaving forever. Jean tried not to think about that too, which was easier said than done.

The car was filled with a tensed kind of silence that suffocated him, made him find difficulty in breathing. Jean chanced a glance at Armin, sitting with his legs pulled up and curled in on himself, staring out at the passing scenary with blank eyes and fingers hidden in the too-long sleeves of Jean’s favorite hoodie.

He swallowed thickly, eyes hard on the stretch of road in front of him as he gripped the steering wheel tight enough that his knuckles turned white.

Armin had been so happy that he was accepted to Sina, one of the top five colleges in Vancouver. He’d been ecstatic about the once in a lifetime opportunity, about graduating a year earlier and starting out on his dreams that he couldn’t stop talking about it for weeks. It was the only thing he talked about.

But as the days on the calendar ticked off until barely a week was left before his departure, Armin’s eyes lost their shine, his slight frame tenser than usual, and Jean felt bad because it was partially his fault. 

Jean reached over to grasp Armin’s hand and tugged it up to his lips. He glanced at his boyfriend with a strained smile and kissed his knuckles.

“Relax, gorgeous. Everything’s gonna be okay.”

Armin looked at him with tears in his eyes, his gold spun hair glowed from the sunlight shinning in through the window.

  



	3. Chapter 3

Two weeks seemed like an awfully long stretch of time when your boyfriend was a country away. Jean was buried in frustration with how needy and desperate he was being, and dreaded how he was even going to make it through the haunting weeks and months waiting ahead of him before Armin could visit him during one of his scarce breaks. He was situated in front of his desk for the last twenty minutes, bouncing his right leg in a tic and burning a hole into the homepage of his Skype account with his intense stare.

The brunet let out a huff of breath, eyes darting to the time stamp on the corner of the screen for the fifth time in three seconds. Armin had texted him that he finally, _finally_ , got the whole ordeal of clearing up paperworks, familiarizing himself with the college and settling into his new dorm out of the way so that they could finally sit down for a long awaited video call that they had both really needed.

Jean had bombarded Armin’s phone with countless texts on a daily basis from the very moment he got home after sending Armin off, and they tried to get a few phone calls in between Armin’s hectic schedule with his new life, but nothing could beat seeing Armin again and talking with him face-to-face.

The ringing of an incoming call had Jean launching from his seat to answer it, his heart lodging itself into his throat when the connection was set and he was met with Armin’s dazzling smile.

“ _Jean!_ ” The blond beamed and did a cute, excited little wave that further widened the grin on Jean’s face.

“Hey, beautiful.” Jean loved how Armin smiled a little happier at that.

“ _Sorry I took so long. I forgot my laptop was out of juice and I couldn’t find the adapter._ ”

“Don’t worry about it.” He assured. “You didn’t take that long.”

Armin’s hair was slightly awry and his cheeks were flushed from exertion. Jean could imagine how Armin must have dashed around his room minutes ago, frantically in search for the adapter among the mess of books and research papers his professors had most likely recommended he should read over before he started class next week.

Jean bit his lip to hold in a laugh at the mental visual playing in his head, and focused on studying Armin’s profile as his boyfriend tried to tame his hair into a ponytail. It felt surreal to see Armin on the other side of his computer screen. They had never video chatted before because there was never really a need to. Whenever Jean started to miss seeing Armin after spending every possible minute with him at school, he’d just show up at his house because it was more sensible than Skyping when he was only ten minutes away.

Jean didn’t even have to climb in his car to get to Armin’s house because that was just how nearby his boyfriend was to him back then, but now they were so far apart and Jean had no idea how to deal with the distance. He forced down the heavy feeling that threatened to choke him and instead chose to lose himself in Armin’s blue eyes.

“I like how your room’s turning out.” Jean said, resisting the urge to trace Armin’s face on the screen.

The blond beauty twisted around in his desk chair to examine his room for a second before his expressive cerulean eyes and addictively sweet smile was centered back on Jean, just the way the brunet liked it.

“ _Yeah? I just got around to actually put up my books on the shelf. There’s still a box or two of my things that I haven’t even touched yet._ ” Armin sighed, slumping back into his chair and the brunet could feel how exhausted he was.

True to his words, Jean could see a few books taking up residence on the flimsy shelf behind Armin, but the brunet knew it was barely half of Armin’s impressive collection that he had brought along with him, since he’d nearly broke his back carrying three heavy boxes of books up the stairs to his boyfriend’s dorm two weeks ago. The room had been sparse then but now he could see hints and traces of Armin as he began to settle into the place where he would soon call home and Jean had to fight away the recurring urge to ask Armin to come back home. Back to Seattle. Back to him.

He couldn’t ever voice something that selfish outloud because he knew Armin wouldn’t come back just because he asked him to and that would only hurt them both more in the long run. Before he could let himself spiral into the dangerous water that ran deep and murky inside his head, Jean’s eyes caught an object sitting forlornly on Armin’s bedside table and snapped his gaze back to Armin, who’s staring at him with a longing in his eyes that Jean’s all too familiar with.

“Is that a framed photo of us on your bedside table?”

Armin flushed a lovely shade of red and scooted slightly to the left to block it from view. “ _How did you even see it from all the way over here?_ ”

His adorable boyfriend shifted his laptop just to make sure Jean couldn’t somehow peep over his shoulders to look, his cheeks still flushed prettily.

“Is it the one we took at the top of that valley? I didn’t get a clear look at the photo but I do remember you wearing a similar t-shirt back then.”

Instead of answering his question, Armin bit his bottom lip and said the one thing that had been circling Jean’s mind and holding his lonely heart captive ever since he left Armin in Vancouver.

“ _I miss you._ ”

Jean’s eyes softened at the whispered confession, and his voice cracked when he reached out to brush his fingers across the screen. “I miss you, too.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise fluff for the next chapter. In the mean time enjoy some light angst.

“ _Sorry, Jean. I can’t really talk right now,_ ” he heard Armin say and pressed the phone closer to his ear. “ _I have another class that I have to attend._ ” 

He didn’t sound annoyed which was good, Jean concluded, but it didn’t eliminate the disappointment he was currently experiencing. “No, no, it’s fine. I didn’t mean to bother you. Go ahead, we can talk later. . . right?”

Armin didn’t answer right away. He tightened his grip on his phone and strained to swallow through the lump forming in his throat. 

“ _I can’t later. I have to make a trip to the library with Bertholdt after classes._ ” Jean sighed before he could stop himself from doing it, feeling awful when he heard Armin’s breath hitched. “ _Jean? Are you mad?_ ” The blond called out warily, causing the brunet’s gut to churn from guilt.

“No!” Heads turned to look at him in the hallway. Jean flushed. “I’m not mad, no. Just. . . tired is all.”

“ _Of us?_ ” Armin asked tearfully.

“No! Definitely not. Never.” He sucked in a shaky breath, trying not to imagine Armin clutching his own phone like a lifeline as he bit his nails, his bright blue eyes filled with tears. “Never.” Jean repeated strongly.

“ _Okay. . ._ ” Was his boyfriend’s weak reply. Jean’s grunt indicated that he wasn’t pleased with the answer, fishing a light chuckle from the blond. “ _I gotta go now. Talk to you tonight?_ ” Armin sounded uncertain. 

“Just try and stop me from calling you.” Jean said with a light smile that widened into a grin at his lover’s laughter.

It was relieving to know that they weren’t going to let that small mishap get the best of them, though these rocky bumps in their relationship was happening more and more often. Jean tried to be optimistic. He was pretty sure they were nothing more than that; road bumps. They were fine.

“ _Won’t even dream of it. I love you._ ”

He hummed, closing his eyes and trying to visualize Armin biting the plump flesh of his bottom lip in the way he always did when he told Jean he loved him.

“I love you too.”

He pocketed his phone and unlocked his locker to exchange his books for the next class, staring wistfully at the photo of Armin tapped to the inside of the door. Marco’s warm hand landed on his shoulder and gave him a light shake.

“It will work out. Stop worrying so much.” His freckled friend said with the exact same amount of encouragement present in his voice for the past four months.

Armin was laughing in the photo. His hair a mess of autumn leaves. Jean cracked a smile. “I’ll be damned if it doesn’t.”

  



End file.
